The Ordinary Times

Prepare to be dazzled.

Because it’s Friday and because I stumbled across these, I’m going to introduce my humble collection of Microsoft Paint art. Back in 2001 I held a desk job similar to the one I hold now. I was seventeen, and often extremely bored. With this came the desire to create in elusive ways so as not to be noticed by The Man. Clearly I am still up to the same antics even as I write these very words. Here are my original pieces of work, by steady hand, using merely the mouse. BEHOLD!

note: click on each image to get the full fuckin’ effect.

“Redonkulous” I think this was around the time I thought donkey jokes were really funny. I kind of hate a lot about this one aside from the facial expression.

“Untitled” A narrative piece. It tells the story of how I crashed my bike and destroyed my own dinner in downtown Eugene one evening on the way to a party. The buildings were sad for me.

“Weedhead” True to life portrait of a friend’s cat. Weedhead actually had hearts for pupils. He was also quite the jittery fellow, which is noticeably conveyed in the rumpled fur. I am that good.

“Crackcorn” Undoubtedly my best work. Funny enough, Crackcorn was the first in the series. To this day when I peer into his eyes I still see God.

“The Legend” The least detailed of the five, The Legend was dedicated to two of my good friends Nathaniel and Matt. For one long summer we were inseparable. The conversation drifted and titillated, but always returned to one topic. Ryan Adams. Those two truly believed Ryan and his music to be otherworldly. Although I never agreed with this notion I did take delight in their never ending banter. We would sit for hours contemplating the deeper meaning of life, disc golf, and Ryan’s many lyrics. Those two have since moved on and lost touch but the memory lives on. And now Ryan’s banging Mandy Moore! Way to go, big guy.